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Does it matter if a woman is a single-parent?

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Posted on October 02,2014

I once had an account on a dating website and had taken an interest in browsing profiles of the men that joined the same service. Foreign men were sort of a new discovery for me and finding out what they like is like reading a new book under the Adventure genre. I saw one profile that described what he didn't like and under the 'About me" section, he wrote that he didn't want women with their own kids because he doesn't want to raise other people's kids. I've also found several other account holders with the same sentiment. I know that not all men think the same and there are those who would welcome his partner's child/ren nonetheless but I would like to know others' view about this. I'm a single parent to a seven-year-old boy so I guess that hit hme. 

on October 2, 2014 6 likes

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I am a single parent too :) i met some men who are honest enough that they dont like single moms, it hurts a little on my part. That's why i dont mind surfing a lot in net just to look a lifetime partner, instead i focus on my work, save money and travel a lot soon :) 

i set my mind that in God's grace my lifetime partner will come in a right time :) 

 

 

 

 

on October 2, 2014 8 likes

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Hi Elaine,

Sometimes it does matter, and sometimes it's not. 

He will accept you if he loves you and you are meant to be.

Everyone here has it's own preferences.

God bless!

 

Elaine said:

I once had an account on a dating website and had taken an interest in browsing profiles of the men that joined the same service. Foreign men were sort of a new discovery for me and finding out what they like is like reading a new book under the Adventure genre. I saw one profile that described what he didn't like and under the 'About me" section, he wrote that he didn't want women with their own kids because he doesn't want to raise other people's kids. I've also found several other account holders with the same sentiment. I know that not all men think the same and there are those who would welcome his partner's child/ren nonetheless but I would like to know others' view about this. I'm a single parent to a seven-year-old boy so I guess that hit hme. 


 

on October 2, 2014 4 likes

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Elaine said:

I once had an account on a dating website and had taken an interest in browsing profiles of the men that joined the same service. Foreign men were sort of a new discovery for me and finding out what they like is like reading a new book under the Adventure genre. I saw one profile that described what he didn't like and under the 'About me" section, he wrote that he didn't want women with their own kids because he doesn't want to raise other people's kids. I've also found several other account holders with the same sentiment. I know that not all men think the same and there are those who would welcome his partner's child/ren nonetheless but I would like to know others' view about this. I'm a single parent to a seven-year-old boy so I guess that hit hme. 


Good day everyone. This is my first response to a post since I came back from planet Heart Broken :D As I see there's newbies and ofcourse I still can see familiar faces. Back to the old times again friends.


Hi Elaine. To your post, I guess it matters to men who set their own standards. just like us, we also have our own preferences. For me I just understand them and respect thier choice because after the long long waiting, I guess there would really that special someone whose preferences is set exactly just for you. So don't feel bad when you read it next time from someone you like :)


Have a nice day

 

Lyzle

on October 2, 2014 2 likes

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Lyzle said:

 

Elaine said:

I once had an account on a dating website and had taken an interest in browsing profiles of the men that joined the same service. Foreign men were sort of a new discovery for me and finding out what they like is like reading a new book under the Adventure genre. I saw one profile that described what he didn't like and under the 'About me" section, he wrote that he didn't want women with their own kids because he doesn't want to raise other people's kids. I've also found several other account holders with the same sentiment. I know that not all men think the same and there are those who would welcome his partner's child/ren nonetheless but I would like to know others' view about this. I'm a single parent to a seven-year-old boy so I guess that hit hme. 


Good day everyone. This is my first response to a post since I came back from planet Heart Broken :D As I see there's newbies and ofcourse I still can see familiar faces. Back to the old times again friends.


Hi Elaine. To your post, I guess it matters to men who set their own standards. just like us, we also have our own preferences. For me I just understand them and respect thier choice because after the long long waiting, I guess there would really that special someone whose preferences is set exactly just for you. So don't feel bad when you read it next time from someone you like :)


Have a nice day

 

Lyzle


Hi Lyzle

                Welcome back. There are many men who will accept the children a woman already has. I find it most likely that the man would want to adopt them. I'm saddened by the experiece you had to go through. Not an easy thing. God has something great waiting for you. Take care...

          

on October 2, 2014 3 likes

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Elaine said:

I once had an account on a dating website and had taken an interest in browsing profiles of the men that joined the same service. Foreign men were sort of a new discovery for me and finding out what they like is like reading a new book under the Adventure genre. I saw one profile that described what he didn't like and under the 'About me" section, he wrote that he didn't want women with their own kids because he doesn't want to raise other people's kids. I've also found several other account holders with the same sentiment. I know that not all men think the same and there are those who would welcome his partner's child/ren nonetheless but I would like to know others' view about this. I'm a single parent to a seven-year-old boy so I guess that hit hme. 


Hi Elaine

              There are many men willing to accept a woman with children. You do not have to worry about that. Most of the men that would do that I am sure they would also want to adopt the children. For some it is just there personal preference. When you do find that special and right man, expect that he might want adopt your son. Wish you the best always. Have no worries the right man will come your way in God's time...

on October 2, 2014 0 likes

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Hi Lyzle,

Yes Welcome back!, hoping ang looking forward to see more of you here at the forum. 

God bless!

on October 2, 2014 1 likes

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Hi Elaine,

Good question, hope you get good answers from the men here , in the meantime please allow me to share my thoughts.

I think the answer boils down to personal preferences. As they say different strokes for different folks.

I for one has no children but would welcome a partner who has a child of his own. It is better though if the child is younger than older so both parents could contribute/influence/shape the child in the values, principles, education, ethics, and spirituality that both agreed to. In your case, having a seven year old son , if I man finds your wholesome character ( inside and out) as one he would want in a partner, I would think that it should not be a problem. He will love who you love.Just show him ypu love him as much or even more. Just show make sure to show your man that God is always first ( no competition in this one)  and the rest is second ( him and your son being equal …or maybe your man second and son third? have to agree on this one ). Keep praying to be aligned in God's will, He has the best plans for you. Though there were be people/men who woudnt like you having a child, there will be some who would accept you as a package . Be encouraged, after all , all you need is one husband :-)

 

Wish you all the best! 

on October 2, 2014 2 likes

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Based on the single mothers I see where I live in America, I have a strong preference for not getting involved with them. Blended families are difficult.  And I question how devoted one of those women would be to me vs. her children.  It is not saying that there is something wrong with single mothers.  It is simply saying I would prefer a woman without children.  The culture is different in Phils, but still the blended family would be difficult.  

on October 2, 2014 1 likes

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There is nothing wrong with single mothers,  some men do not to raise another mans children,  howerer a step-child or adopted child will return the love given 10 fold.  God bless all children,  and the people who raise them.

on October 2, 2014 9 likes

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Very well said here M I agree with you. 

@ Elaine...just to add.... When you fall in love again, you fall for someone who will made you feel that GOD is his number ONE, and you his ONLY one. You will know that he truly loves you, it is when he brings you.. CLOSER to GOD.

God bless!

 

M said:

Hi Elaine,

Good question, hope you get good answers from the men here , in the meantime please allow me to share my thoughts.

I think the answer boils down to personal preferences. As they say different strokes for different folks.

I for one has no children but would welcome a partner who has a child of his own. It is better though if the child is younger than older so both parents could contribute/influence/shape the child in the values, principles, education, ethics, and spirituality that both agreed to. In your case, having a seven year old son , if I man finds your wholesome character ( inside and out) as one he would want in a partner, I would think that it should not be a problem. He will love who you love.Just show him ypu love him as much or even more. Just show make sure to show your man that God is always first ( no competition in this one)  and the rest is second ( him and your son being equal …or maybe your man second and son third? have to agree on this one ). Keep praying to be aligned in God's will, He has the best plans for you. Though there were be people/men who woudnt like you having a child, there will be some who would accept you as a package . Be encouraged, after all , all you need is one husband :-)

 

Wish you all the best! 


 

on October 3, 2014 2 likes

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James, you have good thoughts here, but it really is deceitful to include that last sentence if it doesn't happen.  It builds hopes that often ends with hurts.  May God's people build up these folks in the things of Christ without making promises that may never come to pass.  It may be you are just trying to relieve a disquited soul, but may we do so without presumption upon God (Psa.19:13; II Pet.2:10).

James said:

 

Elaine said:

I once had an account on a dating website and had taken an interest in browsing profiles of the men that joined the same service. Foreign men were sort of a new discovery for me and finding out what they like is like reading a new book under the Adventure genre. I saw one profile that described what he didn't like and under the 'About me" section, he wrote that he didn't want women with their own kids because he doesn't want to raise other people's kids. I've also found several other account holders with the same sentiment. I know that not all men think the same and there are those who would welcome his partner's child/ren nonetheless but I would like to know others' view about this. I'm a single parent to a seven-year-old boy so I guess that hit hme. 


Hi Elaine

              There are many men willing to accept a woman with children. You do not have to worry about that. Most of the men that would do that I am sure they would also want to adopt the children. For some it is just there personal preference. When you do find that special and right man, expect that he might want adopt your son. Wish you the best always. Have no worries the right man will come your way in God's time...


 

on October 3, 2014 0 likes

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Amen Brian...one of the problems with sin or divorce.  I must say again, God created man to never experience these things until sin entered the world.

Brian said:

Based on the single mothers I see where I live in America, I have a strong preference for not getting involved with them. Blended families are difficult.  And I question how devoted one of those women would be to me vs. her children.  It is not saying that there is something wrong with single mothers.  It is simply saying I would prefer a woman without children.  The culture is different in Phils, but still the blended family would be difficult.  


 

on October 3, 2014 1 likes

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@Robert

 

While it is not God's will for us to experience such things as divorce many of us have.  Divorce from my point of view is good and bad.  The spouse who wants out is happy.  The one who does not, is hurt badly.  I think one of the challenges for finding a spouse for either a man or a woman is to find somebody who is willing to endure unhappy periods of life.  Many Americans only want to marry for better, for riches, for health.  

And if anyone left their spouse because they "just wanted to be happy" or some other selfish reason, I would hope they do not marry again unless they have a new heart.  

on October 3, 2014 2 likes

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@Elaine,
I like what James posted in a different thread on Crying.  It said,
Boys will not even raise their own children.
Men will even raise someone else's children.

You say you already know this.  I know it is true.  Obviously you'll need a man and not a boy.  But of course it will depend on each person's preferences.  Now regarding your preferences; Do you know that your account is set to have strict age limits?  Whether you set it intentionally or not, I suggest you remove the strict limits and see if a man comes along.  He may be better than you hoped for or could even have imagined.  You can still ban him if you feel you must, but right now, some men can't see your profile.
Does it feel like it's 96 degrees in here to anyone else? (To those who know of a similar post LOL)


@Precious Lyzle,
You know?  I had checked on your profile in the past week or two to see if you had been around.  But you had not been around for a long time.  I'm so sorry to see you back under these circumstances.  Yesterday, I prayed that you would find some godly women to talk to.  Several godly women here on CF do daily devotionals.  I see you are not in a hurry for a relationship, but I think you should get into dating immediately!  The last time I wrote you, I just said generally to read your bible.  But here is a specific plan for you to consider.  The immediate dating I have in mind for you is only to reserve 3 to 5 minutes of your time each morning to read a chapter of the book of Proverbs.  You can even listen to it online.  I do not know your spiritual life, but Proverbs has 31 chapters, which is perfect for reading 1 chapter for every day of the month.  The plan would be to read or listen to Proverbs 4 on the 4th day of the month (October 4th); Proverbs 5 on October 5th and so on.  We just started a new month and it will be easy for you to start with Proverbs 1 and catch up over the weekend to the current day's chapter.  Think of it as a date with our friend, our Lord, our King, our Comforter.  John 15:15

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Proverbs+1&version=KJV (There is an icon that looks like a speaker near the center of the page or top-right of the verses.)

https://www.biblegateway.com/audio/mclean/kjv/Prov.1

http://www.englishtagalogbible.com/proverbs-chapter-1.htm

http://www.englishtagalogbible.com/john-chapter-15.htm#verse-15

http://www.englishtagalogbible.com/john-chapter-14.htm#verse-16

Have you heard this quote, "A woman’s heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man should have to seek Him first to find her."?

God bless you Lyzle.

on October 3, 2014 2 likes

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